Masturbation is, according to information provided in part by Wikipedia, the following:
Gustav Klimt’s “A Young Woman Masturbating” (1916).
Masturbation refers to sexual stimulation, especially of one’s own genitals (self masturbation), often to the point of orgasm. The stimulation can be performed manually, by other types of bodily contact (short of sexual intercourse), by use of objects or tools, or by some combination of these methods. Masturbation is a common form of autoeroticism, and the two words are often used as synonyms, although masturbation with a partner (mutual masturbation) is also common. Animal masturbation has been observed in many species, both in the wild and in captivity.
The word masturbation is believed to derive from either the Greek word mezea (μεζεα, “penises”) or the Latin manus (“hand”) and the Latin turbare (“to disturb”). A competing etymology based on the Latin manu stuprare (“to defile with the hand”) is said by the Oxford English Dictionary to be an “old conjecture”.
It is held in many mental health circles that masturbation can relieve depression and lead to a higher sense of self-worth. Masturbation can also be particularly useful in relationships where one partner wants more sex than the other – in which case masturbation provides a balancing effect and thus a more harmonious relationship.
Both sex and masturbation lower blood pressure. A small study has shown that in one test group, recent full intercourse resulted in the lowest average blood pressure in stressful situations. Masturbation then led to lower blood pressure than did no recent sexual activity.
The legal status of masturbation throughout history has varied from virtually unlimited acceptance to complete illegality. In a 17th century law code for the Puritan colony of New Haven, Connecticut “blasphemers, homosexuals and masturbators” were eligible for the death penalty. And it sometimes seems that Connecticut has not progressed much further than this puritan thinking.
But lest not we digress here folks. Dr. Kinsey supposedly had a joke that went something like this. “My research indicates that 95 percent of human males masturbate. Further study indicates that the other 5 percent lie!”
In today’s world jerking off has become an art form with many different specialty categories. Now lets face it guys, if you are reading this article you are well aware of the good old standards. I’m talking about the staples now; to memories of past experiences, to porn magazines, to porn DVDs, to internet porn, (Yes we saw you at the office while you were supposed to be doing research for the boss dude! That web cam is a tricky thing to have up there don’t-ya-know!) phone sex, cyber sex, looking out the window at the guy next door, or even the guy you have been eyeing at the end of the bar all night. Yeah you dude!
Anyway that’s not the only specialty. We have the new. Modern type. The political jerk-off. How many times are we getting jerked off by the people we put in office? “Obamas health care ideas will bankrupt the nation!” This being said by talking heads who are dependant on big contributions at election time from the insurance companies who do not want to lose those gigornic profits. “The Government will pick and choose who gets care.” What actually was said was that the government would stop the insurance companies from searching out ways to decline payment for things you though were covered. And once again, I say to you that I want to see one, just one single sheepacan [republican] show me the ID card saying you are excempt from being rejected by your insuarance company for a pre-exsisting condition when you change jobs and thus insurance carriers. Congratulations, you have been JERKED-OFF by a group of politicians. And they are the only ones who get to enjoy it. You, on the other hand, might just die because your heart condition was pre-exsisting and that caused the heart attack. Take a number for the free clinic and hope you make it down the street dude.
Or how about one of the best ones yet. FOX News. One of the biggest jerk-offs in all history. A word to politicians. Try the old fashion way listed above. It has a lot more benefits than the way you get off now.